Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Big, fluffy house shoes..

     Well, I woke up this morning with a terrible congestion headache/migraine. Of course, I've told my mother that it's probably a sinus infection for about 4 weeks now. Did she listen? No. What did she say it might be? A sinus infection. How'd I predict? Mhm.. soo predictable. So, as I sit here with an achy brain & my head about to just fall off my neck - I realized that we're 17 weeks into this deployment. WAY past half way which makes me smile pretttyyy big! :D Christmas & New Years was one of the hurdles I had been dreading since they told us they were deploying and for how long. Now all we have to make it through it Sailor's 22nd birthday, Valentine's day & a very long, 3 day road trip from TN to WA before he makes his arrival. I've never been in a car for so long in my life that I might just end up killing myself or attempting over dose on Benadryl.

     I'm beyond ready to be back in our little 700 sq ft apartment in "rainy" Everett, Washington. I seriously can't explain the anxiety I have taking over my body slowly. I'm ready to pack my stuff up & hit the road from this down home country town to the city life of Everett. I never thought I'd be the city type.. I'm such a country girl that I was afraid of living on our own for how ever long the Navy said so in a big city. 200,000(est.) people is VERY big to me when I'm used to living on 22 acres of land and driving 15 minutes to the nearest Wal-Mart or gas station.

    Don't get me wrong- I absolutely love Soddy-Daisy, TN but this is no longer my home. Home is where the heart is & right now.. my heart is out in the middle of the ocean on a big steel floating boat sailing it's way back to the state.. slowly but surely to say the least. Our home is in Everett & will be until the Navy sends us elsewhere. I need to be back in my own little routine of not having any worries other than paying the bills & wondering what's for dinner so I can take it to Sailor on the pier when he has duty. Those are the good days! I miss cooking dinner, doing our own laundry, his stinky coveralls & NWU's. I miss grocery shopping at Fred Meyer & Safeway instead of Bi-Lo. I'm soo out of my comfort zone here now that it's not even funny.

    I went from a whole 700 sq ft apartment with Sailor & my two little Chihuahua's to a 10x10 bedroom. I'm SO not used to this. I miss being able to just chill out in my own bedroom watching whatever I want on my own friggin tv. Or showering my own shower because I love how the water pressure could seriously knock off a layer of skin in 2 seconds. I miss the little things. & You don't realize how much you'll miss those little things or how important they are to you until they've been taken away. I miss having my OWN car. I miss paying my own bills (although, it saves money).

     I have no reason to bitch and complain about the life I live in Everett or the life I live here in Soddy. I'm just getting a point across that I'm nearing 21 years of age & our 3 year anniversary.. living at home, even if it is for only 2 months, just doesn't seem right. Next deployment, which he'll relocate, I'm moving home. Probably a big mistake but I'm seriously considering finding a furnished apartment to live in for the 5-8 months he's deployed.

     I just don't think I could do this all over again. I feel like I'm in school again.

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