Wednesday, July 27, 2011


In about a month, I'm going to be deleting this blog. I've moved over to WordPress. I'm sticking over there because of privacy. If you want, follow along, book mark me.. whatever :)

For now, I'm peacin' out

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

don't you dare..

look at me with those judging eyes. You have no idea what I'm going through, don't pass judgement upon me. You don't know what you would do if you were in my shoes. I don't want your advice or pity -- it won't help. This is one thing that God, Sailor & I will have to figure out on our own.

I'm tired of people judging me because I'm so 'negative' lately. Have you ever thought that maybe I have a good reason to be? I'm sure you haven't.. I have a very good reason for being so bitchy, short with the everyone & just down right in the dumps. It's not one of those day, weeks or months.. this is something I will have to deal with for the rest of my life in some sort of way.

I have a reason to be bitter..

Saturday, July 23, 2011


comes in many different shapes, forms and fashions.. today, i'm happy with myself.

i straightened my hair, put on a little bit of make up & i even lost 3lbs since monday! not everything in my life is going nearly as i would like it.. nothing, actually, is right in my life but somehow.. i can always find a slither of happiness. & that little bit of happiness goes a long way!

this is me today:

far from perfect but this is a real smile.. one i haven't seen in a very long time.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Air Force? Weight loss? What?..

I haven't updated in what seems like a million years.. soo, here it goes.
**[I apologize in advance if this blog is all over the place & completely out of order. I'm just going to type things as they come to mind.]**

I'm joining the Air Force. I don't know exactly when I'm going to be signing a contract but it will more than likely be the end of this year or the very beginning of next. Before you try to talk me out of it, I've looked into it. I'm not making this decision completely on emotions -- this is just the best thing for ME right now. It's time for me to think about myself & my future. There are a lot of things going on in my life that I can't quite discuss right now but the military is the answer to a lot of things like: college money, my own stability, self satisfaction & time away to figure out myself, & mostly, to better my health & be forced to do it.

So, that being said, I'm trying to lose weight. About 60 lbs to be exact before I leave for AFBMT. I found this website that give a 14 week work out regimen to prepare you for BMT. I was actually going to start it tonight but when I went down to the gym here at our apartment complex and none of the equipment works. I have to do this work out regimen 3-5x a week, it gradually changes over the 14 weeks & by the 14th week, I'll be able to do a 17 minute run. It's basically like training for a marathon but looking at what they expect from you in BMT, I'll need to be able to do that & then sun. So, starting tomorrow I'm going to start working out on the base & maybe catch a few classes. If I don't do any classes, I may just do some on demand or my Jillian Michael's 30 day shred.

I do need some input, though.. which I doubt I will get because I haven't been on here in so long (no commenting or reading) that people probably think I fell off the face of the earth..

My question is:
What are the most effective ways to diet? What was/is your favorite diet? I was doing Weight Watchers for a while but I haven't paid for it & I don't feel like having to pay for a membership. Has anyone counted calories? How did that work for you? I want to pair an easy to follow & stick with diet with my work out.

Thanks in advance :)